ARGH!

I honestly feel like THE biggest mung geung right now, for all you Cantonese speakers out there. I'm so mung because I just don't get it sometimes. Honestly. My freakin' dad doesn't make sense. Life doesn't seem to make sense. I just want to hide in a hole. Nothing's making it better.

Each day the problem(s) come and go...linger around and bother me...then pass.....then come back.
Everything is so unstable. Shaky. I can't seem to figure out what to do anymore. Everything used to seem so clear. Life's not easy okay? However, that does not warrant anyone to give up and not live it out. What were you put on this Earth for? Humans, a species of seemingly superior intellect, are not wishing to live out their full potential or lead a full life. Why would one make a conscious decision at such a young age...at such an early stage in life? How can one not CARE about life when there's so much out there?! Why would one want to skip through the most glorious years and end up at an age where you're not capable of doing all those things that youth and health allow?! WHY would one wish to shelter themselves from the world when it's the world that they live in? HOW can one not care? What sort of life is that? To me, that's not a life worth living. Life is living in the here and now, and enjoying the moment while planning for a bigger and better future that lies ahead. I am sick of delays. I am so sick of excuses. I am so sick of laziness as a reason.

ARGHH.

Okay, I REALLY need to go to bed and unwind before I freak out permanently.

WHAT a way to post an entry - to come back screaming in a fit of anger and pure frustration after a long hiatus. I had hoped to return on a very positive note. Freakin' bugger......

I hope the next post finds me in much better spirits.